Monthly Archives: June 2014

Daygame approachathons – bad idea?

So another blogger that I follow is doing a day game approachathon. If you are unaware of what that is, it is were a guy sets aside a reasonable block of time and tries to do a certain number of approaches. 50, 100, or 200.

Why do guys do these? Usually it is for 4 reasons:

1 ~ All game is to a degree a numbers game. If one out of every 25 day game approaches results in a date, then doing 125 approaches will get you more dates than 25 approaches. However you can’t just keep approaching for ever.
2 ~ The guy assumes that by doing more approaches his probability of success on each approach will go up. While this is true for the first few approaches as the guy gets over the initial uncomfortable feeling, his probability of success rapidly plateaus.
3 ~ They are a specific and easily measured goal.
4 ~ Daygame is teachable, and therefore there are a number of gurus pushing it and trying to earn a crust from coaching, blogging, and ebook writing.

Lets look closely at the above reasons.

1 ~ The numbers game. It is actually correct that more approaches equals more dates equals more sex. However that is only part of the story. Approaching and rejection are emotionally draining (unless you are mental, but then you have bigger problems). So while 50 approaches will get you 5 times the dates as 10 approaches, 200 approaches will not get you 4 times the dates as 50 approaches. Because you will be an emotionally worn wreck by then.

2 ~ More sets = continual improvement. Wrong, just plain wrong. Your probability of success depends on how attractive you are. And that depends on your looks (both face and body) and where you fit in on the social ladder (which comes across in your vibe/confidence). Unfortunately the more sets = continual improvement idea is pushed by the commercial interests, otherwise the books etc that they are selling would be fairly worthless. Although plenty of guys want to believe they are getting better and keep going for a long time only to have a massive crash at some point.

3 ~ Exact goals are easier to hit. But just because a goal is measurable and exact doesn’t mean it is actually taking you anywhere.

4 ~ Guru endorsement. To be clear, I don’t doubt that gurus make daygame work well for themselves. It is just that they have already built an attractive body and/or life. In the end approaches are just… approaches. How you do depends on your attractiveness.

So… I think a better use of guys time is to work on their attractiveness. However this is less measurable and is not very teachable (so doesn’t have guru marketing and endorsement). Improving attractiveness by either getting a good body or a good life is also hard as every guy is already trying to do this.

Am I suggesting daygame should never be done? No. But I’d suggest that everyone has a certain number of approaches that they can do a week before it starts to become an emotionally draining ordeal. Speaking from actual experiences, I personally think my number is around 5 to 6 (being brutally honest). If you can get your attractiveness up to the point where you will get a date out of a doable weekly number of approaches then great. If you have to get into ordeal territory then sooner or later you will give up on daygame and will go through cycles of approachatons and then crashes with increasingly long crash periods each cycle.